(#70) Live By Design Not Default - Stop Letting Fear Make Decisions For You with Adrienne Adhami
Ever felt completely stuck, telling yourself, "I just don't know what to do"? For ambitious people, this feeling of confusion can be paralyzing. But what if it isn't a lack of clarity at all?
In a game-changing episode, Tiwa Adebayo sits down with decision-making expert Adrienne Adhami to dismantle this myth.
They reveal that what we often label as "confusion" is actually fear in a clever disguise—a comfortable story we tell ourselves to avoid the risk of a big decision.
Here are the key insights to help you break free from indecision.
The Great Confusion Cover-Up
The phrase “I’m confused” is often a form of emotional avoidance, not a genuine lack of options. It’s a holding pattern that protects you from the discomfort of a difficult choice. Deep down, you might know exactly what you want, but you don't feel safe enough to choose it yet. Indecision becomes a comfort zone to avoid potential judgment, failure, or the scary reality of outgrowing your current life.
Are You Seeking Clarity or Demanding Certainty?
A major breakthrough comes from understanding this crucial difference:
Clarity is knowing what you truly want, even if the path forward is scary and uncertain. It’s an internal alignment.
Certainty is craving a guarantee that everything will work out perfectly before you even start.
Chasing certainty will keep you stuck forever because it doesn’t exist. True progress comes from acting with clarity, despite the absence of guarantees.
So, Are You Confused or Just Scared?
Adrienne shares a few tell-tale signs that fear is actually at the wheel:
You keep polling everyone else for their opinion instead of listening to your own gut.
You’ve been stuck "thinking about it" for weeks or even months without taking any meaningful action.
The idea of making the choice both excites and terrifies you, so you keep finding logical-sounding reasons to delay.
Final Thoughts:
Name the Fear to Find Your Focus
The truth is, you probably already have more clarity than you think. The first step to breaking free isn't about finding the "right" answer, but about bravely naming the fear that's holding you back.
What is the one decision you've been avoiding? Take a moment right now and ask yourself: "What is the real fear I'm hiding behind?"
For an even deeper dive into Adrienne's framework for decision-making, listen to the full episode and unlock your path from fear to decisive action.
🎧 Listen to Episode #70 now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts.